kaerimasen

last night i had a major fight with my parents, and was kinda chased out of my house. im not going to write any details here, but anyway i told my parents something i shouldnt have in a spite of anger. so now im home, but im kinda like being treated like a ghost.

anyway, after sze and kaifon comforted me, kaifon and i went... DA DA DA DAAAA~~~ marina square. yes i finally stepped into marina square after so many months. xD

nothing of interest really, just that it made me feel that sometimes my friends for obvious reasons understand me much better... so now im going to say something i never had the guts to say before, because i know that the NUXE will definitely not approve and not understand. they have spent so much time telling me that its better this way, and that he's an idiot. but this time, im going to tell you how i really feel about this... and how wrong you all are.


its weird, but even after all thats happened, and after many have told me he's a coward and an idiot that i dont need, and how much i deserve something better, someone who can treat me like a princess (ok yes phyphy im quoting you be happy xD), i still cant help but think some things over after a while, that maybe i was the cause of the result that we readily blamed him for. i dont know, i just feel that way.

anyway, this is something that i dont know if the NUXE can accept, or if anyone can actually, but im going to write it anyway. even if i could turn back time, and start over again, with the same result at the end, i would still have agreed to it. true that it ended with me being an idiot and a crazy stupid head that couldn't function for about a week... but still i would have done it. in fact, if you asked me, even if i was given another chance, if by some miracle i could get another chance, i probably could not have truthfully said "no, i won't make that same mistake again". in fact, i think there is a part of me that still thinks about the past. it was good memories, and memories are all that they will be, but still...

anyway.. back to present... i finally got the energy to reach home, thanks to the constant persuasion of sze and kaifon, i finally decided to reach home. but they're now acting like i don't exist. is this way really better? i really dont know.

minna... kyou wa arigatou... honto ni.

demo ne, ima sugu ni kaerimasen.

Takahashi Hinoki

farewell thee mile

well... today's "workshop" was slightly more productive. note the use of SLIGHTLY. i reached at 8 as usual, and managed to pen down some stuff before i went downstairs, which was good because it made me feel a lot more relaxed and at peace with the world than i was yesterday.

anyway... today's workshop. spent the entire day with them getting them to prepare the items... then this guy from the miyazaki camp, i think his name is wei yi... came down and told them his experience... erms.. he was the guy that took the first shot at teaching us japanese. but anyway... after that, they decided to make amendments to their farewell item, shortening it to only a skit. i noticed a few issues arising from this, but i decided not to comment seeing as they probably wouldn't see my point of view, and that IM not the one thats going to be in deep trouble if all hell breaks loose. i tried my best to explain, they dont get it. so there.

anyway, now that they are way behind schedule, kaifon and i have to get to work to bring them up to speed. think im going to write a list of what to do and what not to do when they are in japan. knowing their arrogant heads they probably wont bother, but im not going to let them go to japan and ruin SP's name... especially since they intend to make jackets with our logo on it. definitely not a good idea.

okay i shall go write a list now. i agree, however, with kaifon's statement... "the longest MILE."

and last but not least, chiba left today morning. hope they have a good time. they should be in japan by now. =( im jealous.

for a long time i never felt like i could detest more

but internal conflicts have proven me wrong.

Takahashi Hinoki

more more more problems

well today was an interesting day... more problems have arised today... :)

japanese lesson went really well... most of it i learnt when i was in year 1... but hey its free so im not complaining. kaifon was subconsciously entertaining me, what with the "Hokage sama de..." and the "long, big, hard" incident. then the first problem came when eugene realised that he wasn't booked in... so he came back to school... only to realise that he had a seat at 1pm... so he had to go all the way back.

the second problem arose when LTC predeparture camp came up, and despite everything, we can't skip it. im more sorry for kaifon and nick, who might have to suffer 48 hours of non-stop awake-ness. if worse come to worst, i have no choice but to go... maybe half a day or so... i dont know about aloy... hopefully he settled his dispute.

anyway, after settling stuff we didnt have lunch, so we decided to bring food into the dance studio... rather kaifon and sze did... i decided to skip lunch to further ponder the wonderful lack of time in the world.

the planning went relatively well, though i'd admit its quite messy. but then again the initial planning is always a little off.

i finally got to find out who joanna was... DMC03 student... hm... not really into giving my opinions on her... seeing i dont have much. didnt talk to her at all... cept for 2 sentences. but i feel that to a certain extent... they are... after all presidents and vice presidents...

oh well. =) times are bad... so fine.

seeing how the world is open to all

makes me wonder what i have to myself.

Takahashi Hinoki

gems note

look at my list of issues and problems, and how i intend to solve it =)

issue #1:
LTC debrief, date: 13th SEPT

problem: chalet in the middle of that day

solution: havent thought of it yet, seeing Kaifon and nick both have IMF on that day too. hopefully aloy can lor. if not ne... have to bear more scolding le.

issue #2:
gems selection, date: 20th SEPT

problem: 1) might not be around due to LTC

solution: get xiu or jan to help me choose

problem: 2) choices limited to 11/20 of the choices... mainly the following:
Charting for Financial Markets
Customer Service – The Competitive Advantage
Enterprise Resource Planning
Entrepreneurship
Experience Design
Introduction to Human Resource Practices
Online Entrepreneurship
Personal Financial Planning
Quality Management
Real Estate MarketingReal Estate Valuation

top choices currently go to personal financial planning (a lot of space) and online entrepreneurship (cos i heard its easy to crap). its not much choice... but i want something easy seeing next sem im probably going to die...

ah well.

brain is going to explode from the pressure

must maintain peace

Takahashi Hinoki

my sis' bday.

well... my sis had her birthday today... i actually planned a surprise party for her. nonetheless i thought it was a given fact that for surprise parties, the guests arrive before the birthday girl... but noooo they didnt notice that fact. so in the end my sister reached home first. there goes my planning down the drain.

anyway... of those people who came, i recognised vaguely the following: annabella, emeline, candice ho... and some girl called rachel. i only know this because my sis kept calling her name.

the first point of interest was that i mentioned that we would be providing dinner... but apparently i picked the wrong person to tell... because no one believed emeline when she told them that... and half of them left early, leaving 4 people to eat dinner. we had cake... yummy cake. let me show you what it looks like xD.

(yes janice if you see this, this is the LANA cake. =) )

of course, my sister won't be caught DEAD with a decent photo... she just HAD to do a spasticated face. xD

anyway, there are both upsides and downsides to this day.

the upside was that i finally managed to watch my naruto today... not done yet but im getting there. the other was seeing how happy my sister felt, and how grateful she was that we organised this for her.

the downside, however, was that i had to single-handedly blow almost 20 balloons... you can figure how my mouth felt after that... and that weird pain that you get in your cheek bones after blowing too many? also... for some very very weird reason, the pain from yesterday (in my legs) progressed to my arms. now every part of me from shoulder down has that odd "suan" feeling that just makes me feel like i dont want to moveee. and so i didnt! hahaha.

now i just feel very tired and i want to go to bed. but i cant. still very hyper for odd reason. must be too much chocolate cake.

however, on the plus side, im glad to hear that the YWCA end had more success than i am at home. i kind of regret not going, but seeing that i planned this, and blood IS thicker than water, i dont exactly have an option here.

now all i hope is that mr david lee would reply my email so that i can settle Hiroshima and not have to worry about it. but i think its going to be tough to put on a performance in 1 week's time.. why i wasn't told earlier? exams i guess. ahhh wellll... hopefully i can find someone. if not... i dont know what im going to do.

also, heard that SOMEONE is having a chalet... wow that sounds PERFECTLY original... NOT. downtown east nonetheless. as long as we dont bump into them im perfectly happy with my holidays. ms kwa mentioned that she was going to make us sit in for lunch some time next week... but seeing as the fact that lunch would mean... MILE vs lunch. hm... juggling of my time would be very effective right about now... =) ah well i'll manage. i dont know why... but i prefer to be busy than to stay at home and rot.

cant wait for the chalet. have a lot of things to do... =) including teaching sandy to blade xD

weird days im having recently.

until i feel like my destiny does not belong to me.

Takahashi Hinoki

day of fun

well today i went out with, like i said, nick, kaifon and eugene. we were supposed to meet pw but she got sick, so she stayed at home.

anyway, i finished MMR early, and waited for Janice while counting down. found the paper relatively simple i guess, seeing that i got most of the questions down.

also, we just happened to be in the same class as eugene... hahaha he was doing some chim topic... while wondering how in the world can we do a paper for Mass Media Research...

after that, eugene, me and janice went off to meet kaifon... then we settled some SEC stuff, before heading down to FC4 to eat... i ordered some large piece of chicken... and janice had to help me finish before she headed off to bugis.

after which, kaifon decided to use the loo (btw, count hw many times he uses it). he did his "umph" thingy, so we assumed he was going to poo. then janice left... and we headed off to jurong east to meet nicholas.

we arrived at jurong east slightly earlier than nicholas... by a few seconds actually... hm... yeah. then headed straight for the ice-skating rink. it was about 1 when we reached there.

we met jomel (eugene promptly mentioned BIG HEAD)... though i dont think she remembered me. kaifon msged szeyuan to tell her, and we were saying its a good thing she didnt come... or her face will black black de.

once we rented the skates, kaifon decided to go toilet... again. =X but since they were resurfacing the ice, he took that opportunity.

kaifon was actually quite a good skater, even eugene was complaining that kaifon was skating circles around him. nicholas was getting better, slowly step by step.

as for me, i was randomly zooming around like a crazy idiot. since kaifon and i went at relatively the same pace, eugene said that he was tempted to take a photo because he felt we looked like a couple =X

but anyway, once the children came on the ice and our feet started to lose all feeling, we kind of figured that we won't be skating anymore. odd thing was, they were playing the soundtrack from high school musical. =) (my hair froze... but Eugene was sweating)

so then we left, deciding to go orchard to show nicholas where the YWCA building was, because they were meeting the japanese students there tomorrow.

first we headed off to the toilet...

but once we walked to the MRT, we were ambushed.

first nicholas was approached. as a defense mechanism i decided to push kaifon forward... but in the end he got caught, so me and eugene ran away... we went to guardian to get me a drink...

while waiting we realised that they were taking much longer than expected... so eugene and i varied from topic to topic, starting from the tests, to drinks, to finally how to get kaifon and nicholas away... and we came up with brilliant suggestions (brilliant in eugene's POV)

1) me act as kaifon's girlfriend and forcibly pull him away, and at the same time act as nick's sister and pull him away too

2) call kaifon and tell him there's a major problem and he needs to go hospital, and refer the same thing to nick.

but in the end, we settled for sending them an sms with the message "ganbatte ne! eugene and i wait here for u." kaifon got the message, and he stared at us from that far far far corner.

in the end, kaifon managed to get away without buying the policy, but nicholas bought it... kaifon mentioned that we should have done the first method, seeing that he gave us the "save me" look.

after that, we took a train to dover, where they decided to get off, and take a bus to orchard for some weirdo reason...

there we met seimin, and we took the same bus as her all the way to orchard... we ended up at far east.

at far east, we walked to the figurine shop to see stuff... then to janice's friend's shop to see more stuff. then we walked down and kaifon and nick decided that they were finally hungry.

so we headed to cineleisure because kaifon wanted to eat japanese... but once we got there, nick said he wanted to eat hongkong food... so we decided to walk down to eat it.

they ate quite a sum, i didnt. prices were outrages and i wasn't hungry anyway. for some reason we were cramped up in the corner seats, so our legs kept crashing. then nick mentioned that there were 11 legs under the table. 3 guys and 1 girl. go figure. xD

oh yeah. then we headed downstairs... where kaifon went to the toilet again... kaifon and nick "unsure whether accidental or on purpose" went to the same cubicle. kaifon then got out and used the urinal... so nick followed and used the one next to it... and he took a picture of it...

then they came out... eugene laughing like a dodo... nick next. he showed me the picture. (note i did not see anything). then kaifon came out. and i quote he said "you want to see my **** ah?"

*note. this portion all comes from eugene... i was not at any point of time in the boy's toilet so i wouldn't know... xD

in the end... we headed off to P.S... but stopped by 7-11... so i got a carrot cake.. CAKEY!!!

highlight here was that when we went to action city, i managed to catch the little dog thing that kaifon wanted, it was 8%... he bought it immediately... xD

then we went to blue max, where i proved eugene wrong by showing him that DVDs did indeed come out faster than VCDs.

afterwards, we headed to Douby Exchange... some new place. nothing much there just random shopping... by then our legs (or at least mine) were tired and dead from all the walking.

so we headed to... once again... cathay... because kaifon and nick decided there was no movie to watch. nothing much was at cathay... we just basically walked around it, sat down a while, and walked moreee.

after that, nicholas decided to go home... so kaifon, eugene and i ventured on...headed to raffles place after stopping by 7-11... kaifon was mentioning how he recalled that he went toilet in the corner before... his actual terms were "I piss here before."

Then we headed towards raffles... walked one round... found nothing interesting... pain became increasingly worse by every minute... so we decided to walk through city link mall. By walk through, we really literally just walked through the entire mall...

My mom called to ask me about heels... I asked Eugene and kaifon how long 2 inches were... you do not want to know how kaifon measured it... =X

no browsing whatsoever. Ended up at SUNTEC.. out of all places.. kaifon mentioned that he was going to drink alchohol while helping the MILE programme with their farewell by doing hard gay's wiggle... or rather, thrust. but we all agreed that szeyuan will probably grab and twist... which wasn't exactly a good idea. kaifon and Eugene were laughing about something they called was "against the law to do", because I kept stopping suddenly when my leg numbed up, and kaifon was forced to make a sudden stop behind me. I had to bug the two of them before they finally told me what they meant. =X they popped by Giordano to see rongshen (red underwear) and I took the opportunity to make a phone call to Rongcan.. xD

then we went to the garden to sit for a while.. because our feet hurt and all the shops were closing. We crapped our way through.. kaifon wanted to catch a late night movie, but there was nothing nice on.. so we didn't. they overheard xiuzhi saying "kaifon, nick and Eugene" and became overly curious as to how she knew their names (yes xiu I know its my fault okay? =P)

then kaifon mentioned this: "I am going to go home, go to my room, take off my clothes, and..." the rest was drowned in my laughter. He repeated it about three times. Finally when we decided that we were not going to do anything stupid like watch a late night movie, so we decided to head home. Kaifon and I took the bus, while Eugene decided to take the MRT.

On the way home, due to certain reasons, kaifon called me. (im not gonna mention the reasons here because its really a stupid reason). I tried to shoo him off to bathe, and somehow or another he mentioned that he already stripped. But when I got home he was online.. hmmmm.. odd.. xD but nevermind.

All in all, it was a fun day, though now I totally have no control over my feet. I doubt I can even walk to the bathroom.. =X I cant feel them from knee down.. =X but I had a fun day nonetheless~ hahaha.

sometimes something fun has to require a sacrifice

in this case im glad i did.

Takahashi Hinoki

16 hours

phyphy just reminded me that she forcibly hugged me that day. she went "NAH" and spun me arnd... like dun wan to like that... T_T

anyway... im counting down and i have 16 hrs to go before paper ends... cant wait. xD i just finished chi-square... called ms kwa to get a better understanding of it. its much easier than it looks.. thats cos it looks really chim... i mean look at it... who can understand???

anyway... hm... xiuzhi and i seem to be using chalet as convinient turn away from books. very effective too!!! phyphy just mentioned she got new blog... and new post will be interesting... haha. i shall go see once im done with this.

hmms. cant wait for MMR to be over... =) ms kwa seems quite worried abt being the final paper... guess she realises everyone's brain is going to explode soon... xD

16 more hours to go

i can do it

Takahashi Hinoki

24 hrs to go

heh. 24 hrs before the MMR paper. dont know whether to be excited that its gonna be over, or worried that i havent touched anything yet. probably the 2nd one... but i will do it!!! hahaha. must study finish... =)

hai anyway.. me needs to go study soon... though i dont have the spirit too. ms kwa seems very onz tho... seeing she online and her msg is "open for MMR consultation". but then again she's not the one doing the paper.. and like i told her, she can probably remember her slides after teaching five years...

my table's in a mess... well beats my room in a mess. i shall go fix it tonight after im done with MMR. hai... chapter 8 now... about 9 more chapters to go...

i hope sandy's doing okay... what with whats going on at her hse and all... =X she misses her internet connection...

yepyep. off to spam xiu and jan... and then do my studying for the last time. target: to leave early!!! ^^. (Ms kwa if you read this... dont be shocked. i always leave early de. xD) that's if im done anyway...

fidgetty... cant seem to concentrate

one more day, one more day to go.

Takahashi Hinoki

brain dead

hee... to add to the list of people that have finished their exams:

szeyuan, peiwen, jolene.

all the ppl i know cept myself... =( so sad. i got 2 more days to go. how is it possible that i feel so happy abt friday? could be possible because its ending on friday, and after that i get to go skating... =) yes definitely a good thought. but the sad part about this is... i have 11 more chapters to go... and my brain cant take anymore... its gonna burst like a balloon... ok that's kaifon's saying, but hey it makes sense xD

anyway... today spent the day studying like an idiot. xiu and i talked abt some stuff, did more studying, some auditioning, more studying. and still im only at chapter 8... and i havent even touched chapter 6... haii die liao die liao...

well... nvm i shall take a break and then continue later when my brain works later. good thing ms kwa gave us a detailed hint on what to study... or i dont know what i'll do.. thanks ms kwa.

still curious as to hw ms kwa can find our blogs... hmmmmmmmm.... i will figure it out one day xD

drowning in my dream

tatoe hoborete mo...

Takahashi Hinoki

post for ms kwa~

hahaha ive just been informed that ms kwa has read about my dream. hm... she say she want to print it out... and paste in her room O.o ... okiiii... still wondering how she found my blog... very curious...

anyway... OM just finished. left MMR, as Ms Kwa has nicely put it. yes yes im counting down to the pretty MMR paper... ms kwa's now saying MMR very easy... to her. keywords being to her. haha. anyway, ms kwa is saying she's worried that we're too tired to study for MMR le... which i guess is somewhat true, seeing that OM was a total disaster (i didnt even understand the question). haiiiiii... but i think for ms kwa's sake... we'll all cramp our brains full as much as possible. its our lame ms kwa we're talking abt~

okay.. after talking to ms kwa i got a little motivation to study now.. better go before its gone. ^^ thanks ms kwa~~~

time to study for the last time this semester

brain, work for me one last time please.

Takahashi Hinoki

my brain is sparking

im more or less done with OM... i say more or less because im not exactly done yet. xD well my eyelids are kinda falling... dropping with every word i type. OM is a bad subject to study, seriously. too many terms, and definitions, and it has to be word for word. without the term = 0. and have i mentioned one chapter has at least 25 terms inside? ok cept for the group one, which only has about 10... =X well. first of all im jealous to all those that have finished their exams: which include the following:

waiji, kaifon, nick, yenyen, and many many many many more. however, i pity my angeline mei, who has to deal with Os this year. ganbatte ne mei~

OM... what can i say? its horrible. HORRIBLE I TELL YOU. if there's one subject i never want to see again, its OM. I DONT EVEN WANT TO BE A MANAGER!! and if i did i wouldn't be saying, "oh i want to be an achievement oriented and participative" leader, now would i? nope. terms arent important as long as you know what it means. who cares what it means, those who dont will just ask "what does it mean?" anywayyyy...

anyway, ganbatte to xiu, who's still cramming 1 chap ++... and she asked me to shoo so i will soon enough.. =( after this only MMR left to go.. the final lap. im kinda worried for MMR seeing that i dont really know what the paper's going to be like, and what's my capabilities on it... seeing as i never took an MMR paper yet... the only studying i did for MMR was when we had to do our presentations... and all i recall is one word.. "dichotomous". or as janice says, "dihippopotamus" or however you spell it.

our class has stopped blogging for now, especially certain people... but i figure they'll start once exams are over. counting down... 4 days to freedom. cant wait.

anyway, my brain is sparking from all the information ive absorbed... some of them sorta contradicts with ConB... esp the "Cognitive, affective and behavioral" thingy... i remember conative clearly... this is horrible.

argh... but heck since when are exams not horrible? HM... good question.

oh wellies. off to bed. waking up at 6 tomorrow for a read through, reaching school at 8 just in case. train at 830 is very crowded, nearly died of perfume poisioning the last time. aint going to let that happen again. no woman with a double sized bag is gonna squish me against anyone else... stupid woman. she cant tell that im pushing her back. noooooooooooooooooooooo. she has to have her way and put her bag directly where my notes are. (yes she's short). and her bag, was the size of 2 filled laptop bags back to back. (the big ones). crazy.

well. off to bed i go. eyes feel drowsy. so tired that they hurt when i close them. its become easier to keep them open than to close them. weird.

run the final leg like you've never ran before

head for the goal and dont turn back.

Takahashi Hinoki

pingster dream

weird day today was. i dreamt abt ms kwa... (ms kwa if your reading this pls dun go laughing ur head off)... i dreamt that xiuzhi, phy, jan and i were at my place (u guys remember that white table i haf in the living room)... we were sitting there doing some revising... i think for MMR exam... and then phy suddenly said "lets call ms kwa. i want to ask her this question." so i used my house phone speaker to dial ms kwa's office number. ( note here... 1, dont know hw i got ms kwa's office number... 2, i dont have a phone speaker). then... anyway we called... but we reached her personal voice mail...

"hi. this is ms kwa. im not around at the moment. please leave your name (dot dot dot) number (dot dot dot) and reason for calling (dot dot dot) and i'll get back to you as soon as possible. byebye.... BEEP!" (as in ms kwa actually said dot dot dot and beep... was v weird, and u can hear ms nga at the background)... so anyway... phy was v sad cos she cant ask question... so we decided to eat while studying. ordered pizza... and the person came to give it to us... it was.. MS KWA!!!! (with ms nga at the bottom with the motorcycle rushing her)... (dont ask me how she drove with extra person and pizza)

anyway... must be MMR making me @@... just realised (thanks to xiu) that our test for OM is tues, not wed. thank god i would haf gone on the wrong day. =X that would be bad. heh. anyway... xiuzhi and i haf been talking a lot recently. ^^ seems we have more in common than we thought xD.

and note to all DMC ppl out there... must check this out. high quality editing by some guy...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-yn_Fnve-Q

sometimes dreams intepret your mind

that probably means im losing mine.

Takahashi Hinoki

janice's quizzy thing.

---------------LAST PERSON WHO--------------
x. Slept in your bed: hm. Janice. After project she kinda fell asleep xD
x. Saw you cry: possibly my wonderful bolster lucia. (NOT ECONS TEACHER. DIFF SPELLING.) but if real person ne… hm I guess nuxes. Cant recall who was last. Probably Janice also bah
x. Made you cry: made me cry ah… memory of that person can anot? If yes, desmond, if no, desmond xD vvvvvv long time le. (Chinatown incident xD)
x. You shared a drink with: phyphy (lime juice at clementi!!!)
x. You went to the movies: family (POTC, not POLC…)
x. You went to the mall with: does NTUC count? If so, Janice and phy. If not, erms… kaifon and Nicholas. (technically heeren is a mall)
x. Yelled at you: sadly, my sister.
x. Sent you an email: FANFICTION.NET!!! hey a person is behind it you know…


-----------------HAVE YOU EVER---------------
x. Have you ever liked someone who hadn't like you?: nopes
x. Said "I Love You" and meant it? duh
x. Gotten in a fight with your pet? No. my rabbit always wins, so I don’t bother.
x. Been to California: No.
x. Been to Hawaii: No
x. Been to Mexico: No
x. Been to China: Soon to be.
x. Been to Canada: No.
x. Danced naked: erms I guess when I was a baby I might have. Consciously, no.
x. Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day?: all the time. Ppl changing msn nicks… my story book ideas… etc etc take your pick.


x. Do you have a crush on someone: ehhh… once or twice bah.
x. What kind of book are you reading now: book. Hm… whatever I randomly pick off the shelf I guess.
x. Worst feeling in the world: helplessness
x. Future son's name: Xavier, Lucia, Gail, Jake, soooo many just look in my book… depends on whats the surname I guess… if not it comes up to something like Lester Mo …
x. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: no. they’re all already fallen under my bed or in my cupboard.
x. What's under your bed: like I said… my stuffed animal, some stuff I dropped in there and became too lazy to pick up… Phyllis sometimes when she falls into the hole… xD
x. Favorite sport to watch: good question. Don’t know the answer. Id rather do sports than watch it.
x. Siblings: one real sister, four un real, do not exist brothers. xD
x. Location: hm… body in Singapore, brain probably lost in notes somewhere. Or in japan if there’s no exams.
x. College plans: hm. Singapore no college…
x. boyfriend/Girlfriend: nope don’t have one. Used to, don’t.


------------------------EXTRA STUFF----------------------
x. Do you do drugs: nope
x. Do you drink: water, anything drinkable that’s NOT coffee, peach based, or ACK… the worst of all… birds nest. Oh yah I hate ginseng too!!!
x. What are you most scared of: don’t know. Ppl have asked me… cant think of an answer.
x. Where do you want to get married: don’t know. As long as its on earth and somewhere nice and scenic. AND NOT A CHURCH!
x. Who do you really hate: this I can name a whole list… but I shant. If you know me well you should have figure it out by now.
x. Been in Love: most definitely.
x. Do you drive: in my dreams, my fanfictions, I drive a dark purple Mazda RX-7 FC3S. pretty car.
x. Do you have a job: freelance… kinda… a little…


----------------------------STUFF---------------------
x. Have you ever cried over something someone of the opposite sex did: yes.
x. Do you have a "type" of person you always go for?: yep. This is a dichotomus question, I don’t have to give you the type xD
x. Want someone you don't have right now: nope. I want things, not people. xD that pretty notebook at clementi!!!
x. Are you lonely right now: nope
x. Do you want to get married: in time to come, maybe. Definitely not now.
x. Do you want kids: eto... maybe maybe not. After working at a childcare centre… ive seen the good and bad. =P


----------------FAVORITE---------------------
x. Room in house: my room
x. music: alternative electro (M.O.V.E)
x. Color: purple, blue, teal, white, black. Nothing too bright. Red and yellow and orange are okay… pink definite no.
x. Month: January. Don’t know why.
x. Stone: don’t know. Anything that’s shinyyy… not ruby too red. Sapphire or emerald I guess…


--------------IN THE LAST WEEK, HAVE YOU---------------
x. Cried: nope
x. Bought something: an ezlink =D
x. Gotten sick: last month, not week. Eh wait. Yes I was sick. On Monday.
x. Sang: of course! KANASHII HODO HIKARI DASHITA… =P
x. Wanted to tell someone you loved them: nope
x. Met someone new: online, yes. Offline, hm… lemme see… NOPE… unless you count that OTHER KEVIN that Phyllis played pool with that day.
x. Missed someone: not really…
x. Hugged someone: Phyllis and sandy bah. Xiuzhi maybe I dun remember. Janice… hm define hug… =X
x. Kissed someone: nopes unless u count =3… then… still nopes.


----------- I N F O R M A T I O N ------------
Name: Takahashi Hinoki, TheDarkAssassin, Alex, Alekxsandria, ehto sa… no more le bah.
Status: Single. Not really looking.
Sex: Obviously female.
Birthday: 3/10/88
Sign: Libra… *wow that took me 5 secs to think of*
Hair color: original black, supposedly dyed color, copper pink. End result… dark dark brown
Eye color: dark brown. Not black
Height: 168 cm I think.


----------- F A S H I O N S T U F F --------------
Where is your favorite place to shop for clothes: hm.. would say japan but I never been there… Singapore… My uncle’s warehouse. =) cheap cheap.
Favorite designer?: possibly my uncle… blood thicker than water. For me, anything nice goes. No brand needed. IM NOT BRAND CONSCIOUS LIKE SOME PEOPLE!!!!
What is your sexiest outfit?: hm… don’t think I have one
What is your most comfortable outfit?: jeans and shirt. Like what I wear to school. And my nice shoes. ^^
What do you usually wear?: shirt pants… never leave hse without jacket too!! ^^


-------------- S P E C I F I C S -------------------
What kind of shampoo do you use?: carol herbal essence!!! ^^ v nice smell.
What are you listening to right now: some song one of the Hokkaido ppl sent me. From Mai Hime… English version. Haunting.
Who is the last person that called you?: called me… that SBS woman that ask me whether I got my EZlink card.
How many buddies are online right now?: 26… how many I still contact… 10… including myself xD


------------- F A V O R I T E S -----------------
girls name: obviously the names I go by lah + Haruka
Boys names: long list. Lucia Thomas, Skid, Chris, Gail Schneider, Sheldon Grant, I shall move on to Japanese… Ryosuke, Keisuke, Satoshi, Kaien for starters.


---------------- H A V E Y O U E V E R -------------
Given anyone a bath? MY BUNNY~~~
Smoked?: nope allergic.
Bungee jumped?: nope. Wanna try though..
Made yourself throw up?: nope.
Ever been in love?: yep.
Made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: Yes.
Cried when someone died?: nope. No one I know dead yet.
Fallen for your best friend?: ehhh tooooo… no
Done something you regret?: yes. But nothing I can do about it now. I regret starting to do this quiz too!!


--------------- A R E Y O U ---------------------
Understanding: more or less
Open-minded: yes
Arrogant: rarely…
Insecure: sometimes when I need hug… but NUXE always there. So very rarely.
Random: yah.
Hungry: most of the time
Smart: depending. Book smart, I dun think so. Getting out of trouble, quite I might say.
Organized: just take a look at my room and try to tell me yes with a straight face while looking at me in the eye.
Healthy: more or less. Sick v sick, otherwise, v hyper.
Shy: sometimes. But DMC kinda got rid of that.
Difficult: hm. No one’s told me I am… dunno…
Bored easily: yes im falling asleep doing this damn quiz
Obsessed: anime anime anime!!! Write write write!! ANYTHING TO NOT STUDY!!!!
Angry: sometimes. Its more psycho than angry,
Sad: unlikely. I very optimistic de.
Happy: eh… kinda stupid question, not sad must be happy right?
Hyper: now just sleepy
Trusting: maybe too much.



--------- W H O D O Y O U W A N N A --------
Kill?: AHEM! *winks*
Slap?: my sis
Get really wasted with?: what? Dun understand.
Sex it up with: erms. Not tempted. No thank you.


------------------ R A N D O M ---------------------
In the morning I: am probably sleeping, or watching tv. Or on a bus/train to sch.
All you need is: sleeeeeep
I dream about: the last thing I think of before I sleep
Playing with: my nails. Very entertaining
What do you notice first in the opposite sex you're into: that he’s of the opposite sex. DUH. >< candy =" sugar"><

old flames die hard

is it possible for old, already almost dying flames to rekindle? and wait. xiu, phy, jan. if you guys are gg to start flooding my tagboard with things like "its not worth it..." "dont go there again." "ex's are supposed to remain ex's..." STOP.im not talking abt desmond. (even though he did msg me late a few nights ago. but we shall not dwell into that. i believe... IT WAS THE WRONG NUMBER. xD)

i thought that the part about us fighting for ____ during the first part f this year was over already... that we could just kinda go on and forget about the past, that i could leave it all behind and act as though nothing in the world has happened. but ive realised one very important thing: i can't let it go. as in... how can you when its obvious the other side hasn't either? ok maybe not that they havent, but rather they pretend they havent, and still can smile at me as though the world wasn't upside down anymore.

phy once said that im very big on friendship.. i guess in a sense that's true. and after talking to xiuzhi about certain stuff, ive come to the conclusion that... i just cant seem to adapt as of yet. it's not just a one-sided thing... but both ways i think. i dont know... i shall explain more in detail when ive figured it out.

anyway... i thought that i could go on, pretending nothing happened. okay not exactly. more like pretending that im fine with the world as it is now. half truth, half lie, i guess. i'm slowly getting used to sandy's presence, and like janice says, she's fun to be around and all. but ultimately... because of certain reasons beyond my understanding, i dont know why but i just cant seem to let go. all my glares towards them seem to be filled with venom and ice.

i guess you can say im happy because we proved ourselves, that we can survive even without ____, but i cant help but feel that im not satisfied just like that. odd, isnt it?

dont know, recently my mind's been going off key... i shouldnt even be bothering about this kind of rubbish. kaifon once mentioned i think too much, or that i concern myself with the less important things.. especially when i have to study.

oh well... that's my mind for you. can't stay in one place. but hey~ thats what makes an individual unique!!! hehehe.

last thing to note to all students and friends out there: STUDY HARD!! GANBATTE NE!!!

sometimes flames , but they reignite again

even bigger and brighter than they used to be. Pain.

Takahashi Hinoki

2 down 2 to go

hmm... conb was relatively simple. i didnt leave early though... was about to raise my hand when the teacher, as always, said "15 minutes left. you may not leave." grrr.. why does that always happen to me!?!?!?!

after which, phy jan and i went out to eat, at clementi. we ate a lot of weird stuff, (phy ate plain rice with dark sauce xD, janice and i shared dumplings + carrot cake). and then janice bought this wonderful cake that was quite expensive... but it tasted like heaven. omg it was so good~ almost lana cake level...

after which we decided to go around NTUC, to see what else we needed for a chalet. NOTE TO CHALET PPL.. janice suggests bringing a small icebox... anyone got any? small small one... not the gigantic one for fishes like my dad has.

erms... then of which phy left us to play pool with shawn, some other kevin and some other guy i dont recall his name if phyllis ever told me. xD

so janice and i, being really bored ppl, decided to walk arnd the entire clementi... literally. went to every shop we could see, pet shops etc. then we were bored and tired, so we went popular to sit down.

hm. AT POPULAR... i found this V V V V V V pretty notebook!!!! i want to buy!!!! =D someone go with me after exams to buy, plsplspls???? also, janice and i thought of buying synchoronised notebooks for the soon to change name NUXE... hm... yepyep.. then finally michelle called so we walked back to the MRT to take the train all the way home. we made up weird names... like INATO... coming from chINATOwn... and LEIND (coming from littLE INDia)... etc etc. janice asked me where i was taking until when we were at tiong bahru... i told her outram... she started pouting and asked me to take to douby ghaut... i gave her a -.- face... then took me 5 minutes to explain to her that this train does not go to douby ghaut.... she thought it was the redline we were on, but we were on the green xD. blur penguin.

anyway... well i have four days to start on MMR and finish OM. cant wait for exams to be over, and im not just saying that so i can go out and have fun... oh wait. YES I AM!!! mooohahaha.

xiu posted a new post about the present we gave her, a holey pair of g-string... note... ITS VERY HOLEY.

for once, xiu finished the paper before me and janice... quite amazing if i might say so. then again, she studies harder, so maybe the information works faster for her. hm... interesting concept.

hah. as a further note: I PACKED MY ROOM!!!! =D yes congratulate me. hehehe. all that's missing is my tissue box... =P cant seem to find it.... hmm..... xD

my sis' bday is coming... still have to prepare how to surprise her... and then i got to take music off her computer... cos i dont think she has my taste of music.. =P non-english, that is. hehehe.

also, as a further note (even further then the last one)... almost one month ago i bought 2 boxes of naruto... my naruto... but until now i havent watch. its odd. two possibilities:

1) too busy studying and meeting deadlines to watch
2) lost faith in naruto

i hope its the first one, cos i dun wanna waste my money xD. hehehehe. i saw a short footage of it at clementi that day, while i was with janice... I WANT TO WATCH!!!!!

hm... what else happened since then? hm... oh yeah i need to extract my OM notes... ANYONE HAVE THE LINK FOR BLACKBOARD!?!?!?!

hahaha... sidenote here... sometimes dreams mean something. they say that dreams of killing someone just justifies your guilt towards something else, or your frustration towards the world. the target is usually an innocent life, just to make you feel more upset, but in reality, the ones you hurt may actually be innocent without you knowing. hm... what am i rambling about? hahaha. some of you know her as Girl A... some of you know her as our S... some others know her as... AHEM~. hm.depends on your point of view i guess xD. ^^ anyway.. i shall go study now... that i have a clean environment to study in... makes it easier~~~

hahaha i did a stupid thing today. tried to stick my clock on the wall... hehe it dropped down after 5 secs. stupid idea right.

oh DID I TELL you guys i have a thermometer in my room? =D hehehehe. its a real pretty one... LOOK!!!

hehe its sideways... but u can tilt your head. ^^ ... my room's now... 25C... interesting =D

off to study

hope i can do it

Takahashi Hinoki

getting really blur...

well... as much as i'd like to believe im done with consumer behavior, my mind feels strangely empty. i guess it pulled a good run memorising half the book, but the other half just seems like logic to me... especially the part about family and culture. ive realised that i need to cramp mmr earlier, if not there's no way i'll be able to do THAT in one day.

while we're on the subject of MMR, i got news today that our MMR did overly well. i cant say its better than expected, since i didnt touch MMR at all. once again im feeling really guilty about not being able to pull the weight in DMA... sry once again!!! yeah well... good job guys!!! kinda have a full holiday right now, but HEY who doesnt?

phy's going off on the 26th... i cant send her off, sadly. or can i? if i the airport at 10, i definitely will not make it home before then, and i got a lot of preparation for my sis' bday to do. nvm i shall write phyllis a letter!!! =) hehehehe.

nights ago i had a nightmare abt... urg nevermind i'd rather not mention it. only reminds me of the baaaad memories.

Well... on the bright side, after tomorrow, 2 down, 2 to go!

GANBATTE NE MINNA-CHAN!!!

cant wait for the holidays to come

even if i have to work throughout the hols.

Takahashi Hinoki

my schedule

hehe. finally LSC is over. 1 down 3 to go. ^^ hahaha. i have a feeling that i have a possibility of failing this paper. =) i hope i dont though... its hard going through it once.

consumer behavior's on friday... so i have one day to study 38 pages. also, i handed in the LTC form already, with the money as well. whether or not they let me go is another thing. hm... this is kinda weird

well... fortunately, i have a very entertaining holiday planned...

18th august: CONB Exam

23rd august: OM Exam

25th august: MMR Exam, skating with kaifon, eugene, peiwen, nick
26th august: organising surprise party for my sister
28th august to 6th sept: MILE preparation
12th sept: one night out with the girls (still thinking of new name)
and if i get in... 20th to 23rd sept: LTC
25th sept: dad's birthday

hehe. i likeee.. =)

sometimes free is not necessarily good

life is created to be filled

Takahashi Hinoki

thank you

you know, id never thought id see the day id criticise someone even more than meiling? ... it used to be funny to talk about her. i remember i still had one blog going about her... on and on and on. yes sandy i know im psychotic... but hey no one said i wasn't?

anyway... today for the sake of it i visited a few people's blogs... and i realised how funny it was. there they were talking in extravagant terms about things that they don't even understand. it certainly seemed as though they're having a BANG of a time together, so why not let's leave them that way.

recently ive been talking to xz very often, about school and everything else. i guess this is one of the incidences that made me really appreciate that she was around. i mean, yeah she can be very outspoken and sometimes say things that are harsh, though true, that you dont really want to hear. but that day, i realised what a good friend she is, and how happy i am to have her as a friend. yes i spent a lot of time complaining to her about some stuff, because we actually have a similar point of view on certain things (xz u know what i mean...) and i realised that we both have somewhat similar personalities, even though im VERY much milder and i dont talk to computers THAT much... :D

phy has been getting quite cranky recently, probably because of the exams, but heck, who isnt? the promissory estoppel thingy has got my head spinning... well koala, if you read this, be happy k? my purple glompz cannot always so cranky de... :)

as for jan, jan and i had always had much in common, more or less. we can just talk about rubbish all day long, as we have done for countless occasions. she's the one i usually talk to most, basically because she's always usually there... same CCA... same hobbies, somewhat, same hatred too... :) so in the end she finds out about most things even if i dont tell her. :P that's penguin for you!!!

also, ive had a lot of help from the SEC ppl, particularly kaifon, nick, and sze. they helped me realise one very important thing a few days ago: i dont have to prove my existance to anyone. i guess i know ive thought of it that way, but in class, sometimes i have to admit that my existance is muted by the loud speakers that people call mouths. (xz im used to u le. :P)

anyway, after this exam ends, i have much to look forward to. firstly a day iceskating with SEC, jan and friends, then we have the wonderful bbq with NUXE+sandy. :) thats an interesting name i guess...

also, i realised one very important thing: Singapore fireworks display is small compared to the other countries. kaifon just streamed me New Caledonia's (it's situated somewhere in the area of Fiji... under french sovern... not related to the New Caledonia (canada)... i had to check WIKIPEDIA just to see this.. shows you how bored i was)

well... as for LSC im currently on chapter 2... at the minors portion. hopefully my semi-photographic memory can store enough... im afraid of what might happen if it can't. hm.. one day i must go shopping and get something for xz for her bday... but i shall slowly think.

sometime in the near future

i hope to be my true self

no strings attached.

Takahashi Hinoki

weird day

haha. nick said that im open and willing to share. i just told him my entire short formed tradition with HIM... and i realised something... until nick mentioned it, i totally forgot about the past. as in i really forgot what he looked like, and the pictures i saw myself in with him didnt seem like me at all... seemed like a different life alltogether. weird... seeing pictures that i totally forgotten the feeling...

scheduled a fun ice skating trip with some of the SEC members... nick kaifon and eugene are already confirmed going with me. :) now only peiwen and janice remain to confirm. i honestly cant wait.

also, nuxe+sandy finally decided on an event to do after exams. XIUZHI quick pick a date!!! damn i cant wait, its all so fun and exciting for once im looking forward to the exams!!! ok actually its after the exams.

just checked out xxx's blog, and one line got me so upset... "yyy is great! Really, I dont know what the others think about her" gah. damn her. sometimes you have to suffer through things before you realise the truth about people, the real person behind that mask. im glad to hear that their work had problems... karma as janice calls it. i call it reap what you sow. though its kinda sad that you managed to get it fixed in the end... haix. oh well. psychotic me will find out a way in the end.

as to my previous post, thanks sze for letting me know that... makes me feel better knowing... and sorry for letting you misunderstand... no im not talking about you in the last part of that post...

yeah i managed to avoid ahemy today... :D congrates to me!!!! ^^ heh.

like a puppet

without a back bone,
without a mind of my own
merely following
losing my individuality.

like a puppet
i cry when you tell me to
i smile when you want me to
but yet inside is empty

i have no feelings of my own
no memories i wished to share
everything i had and knew
belonged to you.

and once you pulled your hand away
once the strings separated you and me
i was nothing left
but an empty shell

i try my best to help
i attempt to change what people think
but all they seem to see of me
is a puppet, waiting to be manipulated.

so what happens
when i cant resist
when all i can do is play along
i force myself to do the unthinkable
and sing another puppet song.

Recently I've always been on the verge of breaking down, it's like everything's going wrong at the same time. Family problems, friendship problems, even work problems, they all seem to collide. In the beginning, I've tried my best to keep myself sane, trying to work my way around each and everything, one at a time. But now I've come to the point where I've given up fighting, i just go along. I'm too tired: too many things have been going on.

Since DMA was over, I thought I could relax, and have a relaxing time before exams. But suddenly, someone pulls reality from under my feet, and throws it over my head like a blanket. Problems without solutions arise from that blanket, falling before my eyes. Now everything that I thought used to be important, is no longer so.

I'm sick and I'm not thinking right: all I want is for someone to tell me what to do, someone whom I trust is doing it for my sake, and not their own. But whenever I look around, there never seems to be anyone I can completely tell them the harsh truth, and letting them believe me. so I've forced myself to do so many things that I really dont want to... but its for someone else's sake, not my own.

tears have been flowing out from my eyes like they were taps that couldn't be shut. too many things have been piling up and i feel like im being squished. i was never claustrophobic, but this feeling scares me. unlike the physical feeling of constricted space, we can always overcome it by thinking of wide spaces, but when the soul feels trapped and constricted, nothing in the world can make it feel better.

people have been telling me to smile, and forget about what's currently on my shoulders, and concentrate on the exams. but i have more important things than the exam to worry about. i would go back to one of my old habits, but i promised an old friend i would never do it again. but sometimes i feel its drawing me closer and closer to that edge that i wish never to go near.

i like helping people, its not that i dont. maybe more than most other people. maybe that's why i cant stand people who cant pull even their own weight, when im trying my best not to let them down. like what i mentioned to someone, we all have strengths, only some dont shine as bright. but what i cant take it when people are certain that you're there working to beat the deadline, and yet there they are, worrying about themselves, and always asking if we can get it done or not. their laughter drives my crazy like nails on a chalkboard. when i see you perform, i'll stop talking about this. but until then... dont expect anything less than 100% sarcasm.

a few days ago i also found out that some people didnt intend for me to take this place. it really irks me knowing that she thinks im not competent enough, knowing that she thinks im not good enough for what she holds, when i was the one preparing everything for her. just because she wasn't there doesn't give her the right to say things that aren't true. "This is not a job anyone can do" she said... guess that's what i'll expect from someone who doesn't believe me when i tell her about japanese etiquette... HELLO IVE BEEN TO JAPAN BEFORE~~~ heck it's her that's making a bad impression for the school... not my problem. if you dont want me here, i can always drop out.

gone were the days when i was a puppet

i dont want to be manipulated anymore.

Takahashi Hinoki

exams left

well... the deadlines are over for now... =) all that's left is the exams... and sadly im falling sick. =( thats definitely not good. but oh well... you cant have everything in life.

we missed the deadline by about an hour today, but we're hoping that mr loh doesnt remember. sorry guys that i couldn't get it done any faster. if we get penalised im really really really sorry!!!

i came back.. and i got so tired that i fell asleep. in that period of time nicholas called me. im really curious as to why he needed me... but he said he'll sms me if he does, so its okay. but even if this is stressing... i kind of like it. i like having something important to do, something to look forward to. Life isn't just as interesting if nothing is important.

janice says that she'll treat me seoul garden when we done... in return for me doing the most of the work. but then again... like i said... sometimes work is fun. =)

if everything works out the way i want it to

life would no longer be interesting

Takahashi Hinoki

rubberband

im taking this short breather opportunity while shawn is editing the music for me to make a short post. recently i feel that im being pulled very thin. its weird, because usually i like doing work. i mean... i like having something to do with my life. but because of all the deadlines and the exams, i guess my life has to be put on hold for the time being. hopefully i do well for the exams... like i promised myself i would. but i seem to be getting worse and worse with each semester. >,<>,< im neither here nor there... and its a horrible feeling.

well got to run. shawn's just done with the editing. back to slaving over the computer. also must remind myself to print my feature writing later...

pulled thin like a rubber band

wonder when i will snap?

Takahashi Hinoki

colin parrott's in town~

colin's last day in singapore. for those of you who don't know, i went kitago, japan last year, and met colin there. he was our translator... and we had a lot of fun with him. these are a few incidents to remember him by.

• possibly the most obvious one: my tong gone. janice was looking for her kaleidoscope and suddenly muttered "my tong gone". colin caught on quick and started repeating. insert slang for canadian and you get one weird language.
  
• colin and yuge treated us to ramen. we wanted to order gyoza, but had no idea how many to order. we asked colin, he didn't know how many there was in one plate. he asked yuge, but forgot to translate. in the end, he said in english "how many are there in one plate?" yuge looked at him with a weirdo face and said "Nani?" (what)
  
• during the farewell party, while saying a thank you translation speech, colin got it wrong and said "to further enhance the relationship between kitago and sapporo" instead of kitago and singapore.
  
• this last incident only indirectly affects colin. they were at yuge's house, and colin decided to walk home (Colin's hse is on a mountain, behind my hosts', and yuge lives in an apartment below the mountain). yuge refused and suggested he drive colin up, but colin didnt want to. he insisted on walking. so yuge took out a bicycle and lent it to colin to cycle home... up the mountain...

that was the best of times in kitago. today was his last day in singapore, so we decided as a group to give him a treat and bring him around orchard. at 1pm, christina went to fetch him from the novotel, and met us at clark quay (ok fine i was late). then we took a taxi down to orchard... which colin tried to pay but was denied by christina, me and serlyn. we took him to eat thai food at the lemongrass in heeren (or lemon__ass as kaifon calls it). we ordered so much... colin ordered some unknown food that we didnt understand, but for some weird reason the waiter did... heidi and shuet ni came soon after and we had fun remembering the times we had in kitago. once again, colin wanted to pay, but christina beat him to it.

after that, we walked over to cine... played with the kiki ippatsu i saw when i was with kaifon and nick... and then we took neoprints~ hahaha colin's face looked so funny in some of them!!! after that... we sent him back to the novotel... and he wanted to treat us to starbucks, but everyone refused to order anything... :)

we then started taking photographs... and we met the vice principal of nanichi high school, the same one that we went to when we were in japan. we also saw the english teacher there. it was fun talking to them.... we also found out that when we left, our photograph appeared in the newspaper again.. xD interesting... (he gave us his name card)

we took photographs with both of them, and then serlyn, shuet ni and i went over to chinatown to buy farewell items for them. we bought a lot of junk (which included the "singapore is a fine city" shirt) and bought some items for the english teacher and the vice principal too.

then we went to eat popeyes at the airport...(im not going to mention how serlyn kept leading us to the wrong place) we were so full. then we were joined by clement and xiao ran... after wards we met colin again... and we gave him the stuff. he kept saying "oh guysss..." like we didn't need to... but either way. the vice principal was pretending to cry when we gave him his.

later, colin lost his ticket... he thinks he left it on the plane... hahaha. but in the end he managed to get another one, so there was no harm done. serlyn made a comment about how colin was blurrer than yuge.. quite amazing really. we said goodbye to them, took more photos, and left.

and here i am. the photographs i wont upload here. i'll put it on the miyazaki rios website. www.rios.2ya.com go see it if you really want to. :) was fun hanging out with colin... havent seen him in so long. sadly janice couldn't make it cos her friend had some problem... must remember to tell her the funny incidents that happened. colin coming back reminds me how much i miss my hosts... and the days i spent with them. hope that this letter will get a reply this time... :)

some memories were meant to be forgotten

but these weren't any of them.

Takahashi Hinoki

outing with kfc and nicky

today's possible highlight was that i went to orchard with nick and kaifon. okay actually i didnt plan on meeting them, but going home felt like a horrible idea.

anyway... i met them at Taka... walked twice around Kino... >< nicholas kept stopping for aeroplane books.

then we headed to heeren, to look at CDs (kaifon wanted to buy a "my globe" cd... but they din have the latest one) and to look through action city (in which kaifon was upset about not being able to buy the entire collection of the latest series of dogs, and nicholas was upset that they didn't have his batman figurine)

after that we headed to cine... hm... we walked around aimlessly for a while... (i saw a poor guy struggling to open the door... i was kind enough to open it for him... nick and kaifon both said i just threw him into embarrassment ^^V )

nick actually proposed to take neoprints, but we didn't in the end... dont know why. we were trying to decide what to eat when suddenly kaifon's eyes went O.O... (note that the eyes are only this small cos this is the largest blogger had to let me use) he saw Hard Gay's Kiki Ippatsu there... they were so amazed... they even considered buying it for our clubhouse... $60... rich ppl xD...

we ate at some hongkong place next to the neoprint machine. oh wait i revise that. kaifon and nicholas ate at some hongkong place... i drank some weirdo lychee drink that tasted more like lemon tea with lychee... treated by kaifon. said its for helping him with stuff... arigatou~

anyway after that we went to see naruto stuff... nick was so tempted into buying ichigo's zambakuto... but didnt in the end. we made a small round around the arcade, before heading off towards plaza singapura.

at plaza singapura, we didn't really do much. they stopped by so i could use the toilet to wash my i-dont-know-why-they-were sticky hands... then we headed to cathay.

at cathay, nick kept "spying" cute girls. xD something about 5 oclock, 6 oclock, and whether kaifon could "confirm target". we walked around an adidas shop, where nick and i were commenting that the two boys in front of us who were playing some game looked like they were aheming themselves from the back.

after that, we went up to the cinema... took a seat and started crapping. kaifon showed me some video that was edited of jack sparrow and william turner kissing. the editing was very good. i tested my skills on nick... he gave me opposite answers. :) got kaifon to try reading the first two pages of da vinci code... he gave up and passed it on to nick. then after that we headed home... :) oh yeah i neglected to mention that nick got a call from SOMEONE (I dont know who) but he seemed so happy he was swaying as he walked. LITERALLY.

seeing is believing

so what happens when you neglect to see?

Takahashi Hinoki

beliefs

today was another weeeeeeeeird day. dont know what exactly happened. i had fun talking to mr lee today. missed him a lot, and finally saw him and talked to him. phyllis was there too, cos she desperately needed help, and decided to ask mr lee for help.

dont know, recently my mind is in a tornado... dont really know what im thinking anymore. part of me doesn't even know what im trying to say, what im trying to feel, or what im trying to explain. its like an entire circle that goes round and round, and never seems to end. sometimes i dont even know what my mind's trying to say... its topsy turvy at this point in time.

different people have different opinions i guess... but sometimes when those opinions crash and burn, there's nothing that stops the two from going down, fighting for what they believe in. im no different. if i believe in it, i will fight for it.

anyway... back to my point. i have begun to realise that the world is spinning out from under my feet again... and i dont exactly understand why this is happening. im trying my best to look forward, and attempt to forget what's past, and its starting to work, possibly because of new people in my life, that have helped me to get over it faster.

i just hope that my other friends, who are experiencing the same dilemma as me, know what they want, and stay true to themselves. as long as their happiness is at risk, it's not worth it.

lastly, deadlines are coming up, and i still have a lot to go before i can finally say i can finish the project. the group's marks are weighing on my shoulders, and its quite heavy... i know i must do my best, but my work just never seems to be good enough. but ultimately, i have to get it done... or i'll never live to see the next morning.

strive harder to achieve what you believe in

don't ever give up.

Takahashi Hinoki