another update:
baby will be out in 45 minutes. WORLD MEET AZEALEA!
Jul 29, 2008
update on xiu:
heard from her brother, right now at 3.51am she hasnt given birth yet. apparently she's not dilated enough, so they're going to go do a C-section, and if all goes well little azealea will be born on the 29th of july, at around 6am!!! ^^ cant wait to see little azealea for the first time.
we're all eagerly waiting the birth of little baby girl~
heard from her brother, right now at 3.51am she hasnt given birth yet. apparently she's not dilated enough, so they're going to go do a C-section, and if all goes well little azealea will be born on the 29th of july, at around 6am!!! ^^ cant wait to see little azealea for the first time.
we're all eagerly waiting the birth of little baby girl~
http://6shikochan9.wordpress.com/
shiko i know you'll be back to read this. your last post really got to me. really. i sat there thinking how things have changed, how so many things are different now. from our first GPQ, to our first balrog. all those firsts. things then were much simpler, and it was so much fun having all you guys around.
now that you and spitz have gone, things have changed so much. ive made some new friends, i've lost some old friends. but most importantly ive gained a lot, and lost some.
looking at that pic, the screenshot you took on the wallpaper of that blog, reminded me how spastic i was.. haha i was smiling like an idiot in that shot. =x oh well. it was fun while it lasted.
i've left a lot of things i didnt tell you... a lot of things i want to, but ive been hiding from MSN so as not to face any of you.. but i think one day i'll tell you. till then... missing you loads~ love xhinokix
p.s. shiko, spitz, degree. you three will always be my number 1 team. no matter what happens. you guys were the best friends i could ever make on maple, and no matter what has changed, this remains the same. thank you, 3 of you.
shiko i know you'll be back to read this. your last post really got to me. really. i sat there thinking how things have changed, how so many things are different now. from our first GPQ, to our first balrog. all those firsts. things then were much simpler, and it was so much fun having all you guys around.
now that you and spitz have gone, things have changed so much. ive made some new friends, i've lost some old friends. but most importantly ive gained a lot, and lost some.
looking at that pic, the screenshot you took on the wallpaper of that blog, reminded me how spastic i was.. haha i was smiling like an idiot in that shot. =x oh well. it was fun while it lasted.
i've left a lot of things i didnt tell you... a lot of things i want to, but ive been hiding from MSN so as not to face any of you.. but i think one day i'll tell you. till then... missing you loads~ love xhinokix
p.s. shiko, spitz, degree. you three will always be my number 1 team. no matter what happens. you guys were the best friends i could ever make on maple, and no matter what has changed, this remains the same. thank you, 3 of you.
i guess for sandy's sake i'll blog a detailed one. ^^ since poor sandy is out and knows nothing.
at noon i got a message from xiuzhi. same one that she sent to phyllis. she told me she was on the way to the hospital, to get checked.
i tried replying her but she couldnt turn on her phone, thus couldnt reply me. so i smsed phyllis and sandy to inform them, and kept my phone beside me.
at 3pm xiu called me, told me that she was in the ward, awaiting. she sounded a little scared i guess, not too much. just a little softer than usual. i think she was probably nervous. it started getting me thinking that you know...this was really happening.
she called again later, to tell me that they just broke her waterbag. she even said it wasnt like she was told that they would, but they just did it, somewhat that she wasnt given much of her choice. each time i was lost for words, i really didnt know what to say. i just kept telling her she'd be fine and that she'll be okay, and to take care.
i got a message later on, regarding opening hours and time of birth. phyllis and i i think both imagined wiating those agonising hours outside the suite, waiting for birth. but i guess this was a little too... extreme if we were really to go down.
now typing this i think little azealea has just seen and breathed her first moment by now... wonder when the birthday is.. hmm.. ^^ must remember to ask xiu tmr.
i'm taking half a day tmr to go see her and azealea. i dont think she expects us tomorrow morning, probably she thinks i'll be over after my work~
phy and i are going to bring some kind of makeshift basket of fruits over. lol. sandy, hang in there pics will be up soon! ^^
its really surreal, that this is finally happening. ive been jumpy all day. its like we're not the ones that are involved, and yet we feel for them.
cant wait for tomorrow~
at noon i got a message from xiuzhi. same one that she sent to phyllis. she told me she was on the way to the hospital, to get checked.
i tried replying her but she couldnt turn on her phone, thus couldnt reply me. so i smsed phyllis and sandy to inform them, and kept my phone beside me.
at 3pm xiu called me, told me that she was in the ward, awaiting. she sounded a little scared i guess, not too much. just a little softer than usual. i think she was probably nervous. it started getting me thinking that you know...this was really happening.
she called again later, to tell me that they just broke her waterbag. she even said it wasnt like she was told that they would, but they just did it, somewhat that she wasnt given much of her choice. each time i was lost for words, i really didnt know what to say. i just kept telling her she'd be fine and that she'll be okay, and to take care.
i got a message later on, regarding opening hours and time of birth. phyllis and i i think both imagined wiating those agonising hours outside the suite, waiting for birth. but i guess this was a little too... extreme if we were really to go down.
now typing this i think little azealea has just seen and breathed her first moment by now... wonder when the birthday is.. hmm.. ^^ must remember to ask xiu tmr.
i'm taking half a day tmr to go see her and azealea. i dont think she expects us tomorrow morning, probably she thinks i'll be over after my work~
phy and i are going to bring some kind of makeshift basket of fruits over. lol. sandy, hang in there pics will be up soon! ^^
its really surreal, that this is finally happening. ive been jumpy all day. its like we're not the ones that are involved, and yet we feel for them.
cant wait for tomorrow~
Jul 22, 2008
manipulative. liar. not trustworthy.
these are the words that have been used to describe me lately. i've really thought abt all these to myself, because its what a good friend told me.
he told me all these, and said he couldnt trust me. that he regretted ever meeting me. he knows everything about me, from what i did to nick, and beyond. i dont want to see myself as a liar, or a manipulative person, and i've decided that from that day i'd change. this isnt the person who i want to be.
as much as not trustworthy, i think thats a combination of fear to trust me, thinking that the information i find out will someday be used against him. well, i wont. anyone who's my friend knows how i treat my friends, and how i treasure a friendship, and i dont want to lose it. they know how hard i'll work, the ends i'll go to for a friendship.
i understand if u cant believe me or trust me because i've lied to you. i'm willing to prove you wrong, just like i said i would. i'll earn your trust again, even if it takes me a while to get it right.
i confess i appreciate the truth: you're maybe the only one who would tell me this, so i can believe you.
it hurts not to be trusted, knowing that they think im plotting something against it. ive spent so long and worked so hard trying to keep myself from ruining the friendship. i've always told everyone else who warned me, everyone else who told me the truth that i was blinded to see, that i stood on your side. it didnt matter to me whether you were right or wrong. i'm your friend and i'll fight for you. i'll protect you. that's my definition of a friend.
i know maybe he's afraid to trust me again, afraid that i might use the information against him. he says he regrets ever meeting me. it hurts. it fucking hurts a lot knowing that.
but there's nthing i can do. i deserved this. even if my lies were for the better good, for him not to feel guilty or for him not to feel the pain that i felt, because i didnt want him to know about my thoughts. i didnt want to burden him with any of it. and because of that, i've now lost his trust.
it might take some time, but when im done, you'll see. you all will see. im not the manipulative person, the liar you think i am. i'm much more than that. its not my style. i wasnt born like this. and as long as i wasnt born, i can reverse it.
so watch me.
watch me change for the better.
this was what you were put in my life for. this was the reason, the meaning of your existance in my life. if my chance to learn this lesson was to lose a good friendship, then the sacrifice is too big. give me another chance, give me the friend i used to have. the one that trusted me wholeheartedly, the one that would look to me for advice.
that's the friend i want back. and i'll prove to you that you can trust me again. just give me that chance.
these are the words that have been used to describe me lately. i've really thought abt all these to myself, because its what a good friend told me.
he told me all these, and said he couldnt trust me. that he regretted ever meeting me. he knows everything about me, from what i did to nick, and beyond. i dont want to see myself as a liar, or a manipulative person, and i've decided that from that day i'd change. this isnt the person who i want to be.
as much as not trustworthy, i think thats a combination of fear to trust me, thinking that the information i find out will someday be used against him. well, i wont. anyone who's my friend knows how i treat my friends, and how i treasure a friendship, and i dont want to lose it. they know how hard i'll work, the ends i'll go to for a friendship.
i understand if u cant believe me or trust me because i've lied to you. i'm willing to prove you wrong, just like i said i would. i'll earn your trust again, even if it takes me a while to get it right.
i confess i appreciate the truth: you're maybe the only one who would tell me this, so i can believe you.
it hurts not to be trusted, knowing that they think im plotting something against it. ive spent so long and worked so hard trying to keep myself from ruining the friendship. i've always told everyone else who warned me, everyone else who told me the truth that i was blinded to see, that i stood on your side. it didnt matter to me whether you were right or wrong. i'm your friend and i'll fight for you. i'll protect you. that's my definition of a friend.
i know maybe he's afraid to trust me again, afraid that i might use the information against him. he says he regrets ever meeting me. it hurts. it fucking hurts a lot knowing that.
but there's nthing i can do. i deserved this. even if my lies were for the better good, for him not to feel guilty or for him not to feel the pain that i felt, because i didnt want him to know about my thoughts. i didnt want to burden him with any of it. and because of that, i've now lost his trust.
it might take some time, but when im done, you'll see. you all will see. im not the manipulative person, the liar you think i am. i'm much more than that. its not my style. i wasnt born like this. and as long as i wasnt born, i can reverse it.
so watch me.
watch me change for the better.
this was what you were put in my life for. this was the reason, the meaning of your existance in my life. if my chance to learn this lesson was to lose a good friendship, then the sacrifice is too big. give me another chance, give me the friend i used to have. the one that trusted me wholeheartedly, the one that would look to me for advice.
that's the friend i want back. and i'll prove to you that you can trust me again. just give me that chance.
Jul 16, 2008
Jul 14, 2008
you know what i hate most?
yes you probably do. anyone who knows me well would know i hate two-faced lying bastards the most. you know, those who, on one end tell you one thing, something you might want to hear, and on the other end, they tell your friends something else.
we've all met someone like this in our lives, we've all seen someone or heard someone do this before: it shouldnt be strange. but when that someone is someone who knows nothing about you, someone who's not in your life in the least, you cant help but find it strange.
well that's just what happened to me. someone who wished me the best in life, in truth wishes i fail.
oh well.
he's screwed.
~~~
am i really blinded?
are there things i've yet to see
is this how it's meant to be
these things happening to me
yes you probably do. anyone who knows me well would know i hate two-faced lying bastards the most. you know, those who, on one end tell you one thing, something you might want to hear, and on the other end, they tell your friends something else.
we've all met someone like this in our lives, we've all seen someone or heard someone do this before: it shouldnt be strange. but when that someone is someone who knows nothing about you, someone who's not in your life in the least, you cant help but find it strange.
well that's just what happened to me. someone who wished me the best in life, in truth wishes i fail.
oh well.
he's screwed.
~~~
am i really blinded?
are there things i've yet to see
is this how it's meant to be
these things happening to me
Jul 3, 2008
hahahahaha i really missed my BTT today. funny story really its not so much i REALLLY forgot i had my BTT. i knew it was today like last night. so i studied until 2-3am, knowing full well i had to wake up at 6+am for my mock test.
coincidentally i forgot how to get there, so i skipped my mock test to do a little last minute studying.. GREAT right? i was sitting on my rooftop thinking to myself and studying... and when 10am came (my test was at 11) i totally forgot. i even put an alarm, but it didnt ring. it was only when xiu msged me that i REMEMBERED that my test was that.
as usual i got lost. so i missed my test. -.- yay me. now i have to sign again. that pushes my road legality back by a month or so =(
coincidentally i forgot how to get there, so i skipped my mock test to do a little last minute studying.. GREAT right? i was sitting on my rooftop thinking to myself and studying... and when 10am came (my test was at 11) i totally forgot. i even put an alarm, but it didnt ring. it was only when xiu msged me that i REMEMBERED that my test was that.
as usual i got lost. so i missed my test. -.- yay me. now i have to sign again. that pushes my road legality back by a month or so =(
Jul 2, 2008
a song for me.
i found this song very soothing. i never could imagine i would like a song like this. its sung by Ninomiya Kazunari from Arashi. the lyrics are really nice and the music is really good too. i dont know was it the words that struck me or something else. my mind is now clear... i more or less know what im going to do.
虹(Rainbow) by Ninomiya Kazunari
いつもそうよ。
As always.
拗ねるときみは。
You are sulking.
私の大事な物を隠すでしょ。
Hiding the important things to me.
その場所は決まって同じだから。
Because that place is certainly the same,
今日は先に行って待ってみるわ。
I'll go there first today and wait.
季節達が夕日を連れて来て
The seasons bring the evening sun.
影が私をみつけて延びる...。
I found my shadow extending...
ビックリした顔で私をみつめては
With a surprised expression, you saw me.
急に口尖らせプイっと外見るの。
You seemed angry and suddenly looked outside.
ごめんね。と言うと
I said "I'm sorry" and
じゃあこっちに来てよと
"well, come here".
ねぇ、ほら見て見て
Hey, look, look.
影が重なった...。
Our shadows are overlapping...
傘がぶつかり真っ直ぐ歩けない。
Our umbrellas are colliding and I can't walk straightly.
そんな私を見て笑っているの。
Seeing me like that made you laugh.
私もやってみせてあげるの。
I'll do it too and show it to you.
同じ様に口を尖らす...。
The same face when your angry.
優しく笑うきみが
You gently laughing
この時間が空間が
at this time and space.
泣きたくなるくらい
I wanted to cry.
一番大事なものだよ。
Your my most precious one.
わざと尖らせてる...。
I purposely showed an anger face...
私にごめんねの返事を持たずに
Without saying "I'm sorry" to me,
優しくキスしたの...。
you gently kissed me.
これからはちょっとくらいの我が儘
From now on it will be a little selfish.
言ってもいいよ。
It's alright to say.
でも私にだけよ。
But only to me.
面倒くさいからって
Because it's troublesome.
素直じゃないんだから
Because I'm not submissive.
何で言えないのかな？
Why can't I say it?
好きだよ。
I love you.
一言よ？
Just those words.
たまには聞きたいな。
You sometimes want to hear.
今日は私と君が
Today, I'm with you.
名字を重ねた日。
The day we will share the same name.
愛が芽吹いた日。
The day our love blooms.
la... la... la...
虹がキレイだよ。
The rainbow is beautiful.
いや、お前の方が...。
No, you are more beautiful...
テレはじめるきみに
To you who begins to shine,
ありがとう。ありがとう。
Thank you. Thank you.
i just realised my new blog has no song bg whatsoever. im probably going to add this song as my new background music. its soothing and i really like it, even if its not my precious ohno singing. if it were i'd be melting by now. x)
right now im in the office helping my dad type japanese. japanese has really become my outlet now... more and more so.
昨日は、 私 と ふうゆえ でんわ お はなします。 ちょっと だけ、 でも ね。。 しあわせ ですよ。 二時半、 三時？ わすれた。。 ぜんぶ も いま 大丈夫 から。。 私 の ゆめ、 私 の 未来、 大丈夫 から。。 何時も 何時も 全部 も しらない。。 ちょっと むずかしい ね。。 でも さ。。 いま は。。。 してる よ。 たいせつな ひと、 ごめなさい。 ぜんぶ も あなた の ため に。
ありがとう、 みんな。 ありがとう、あなた。 いま 私 わすれない、 けど つよくなる。 あなた のために だから。いのち わ 生きてる。 まって いた、 私たち の 日。。 ともだち も いい。。 絶対 に。。 はなせない。
ok i got to go back to work~ hehehee. ^^ PHYPHY REMEMBER STUDY FOR UR TEST!
[[OMG I FORGOT TOMORROW I HAVE MY BASIC THEORY TEST AND I SO HAVE NOT STUDIED!!! DIEEEE!!!!!]]
i found this song very soothing. i never could imagine i would like a song like this. its sung by Ninomiya Kazunari from Arashi. the lyrics are really nice and the music is really good too. i dont know was it the words that struck me or something else. my mind is now clear... i more or less know what im going to do.
虹(Rainbow) by Ninomiya Kazunari
いつもそうよ。
As always.
拗ねるときみは。
You are sulking.
私の大事な物を隠すでしょ。
Hiding the important things to me.
その場所は決まって同じだから。
Because that place is certainly the same,
今日は先に行って待ってみるわ。
I'll go there first today and wait.
季節達が夕日を連れて来て
The seasons bring the evening sun.
影が私をみつけて延びる...。
I found my shadow extending...
ビックリした顔で私をみつめては
With a surprised expression, you saw me.
急に口尖らせプイっと外見るの。
You seemed angry and suddenly looked outside.
ごめんね。と言うと
I said "I'm sorry" and
じゃあこっちに来てよと
"well, come here".
ねぇ、ほら見て見て
Hey, look, look.
影が重なった...。
Our shadows are overlapping...
傘がぶつかり真っ直ぐ歩けない。
Our umbrellas are colliding and I can't walk straightly.
そんな私を見て笑っているの。
Seeing me like that made you laugh.
私もやってみせてあげるの。
I'll do it too and show it to you.
同じ様に口を尖らす...。
The same face when your angry.
優しく笑うきみが
You gently laughing
この時間が空間が
at this time and space.
泣きたくなるくらい
I wanted to cry.
一番大事なものだよ。
Your my most precious one.
わざと尖らせてる...。
I purposely showed an anger face...
私にごめんねの返事を持たずに
Without saying "I'm sorry" to me,
優しくキスしたの...。
you gently kissed me.
これからはちょっとくらいの我が儘
From now on it will be a little selfish.
言ってもいいよ。
It's alright to say.
でも私にだけよ。
But only to me.
面倒くさいからって
Because it's troublesome.
素直じゃないんだから
Because I'm not submissive.
何で言えないのかな？
Why can't I say it?
好きだよ。
I love you.
一言よ？
Just those words.
たまには聞きたいな。
You sometimes want to hear.
今日は私と君が
Today, I'm with you.
名字を重ねた日。
The day we will share the same name.
愛が芽吹いた日。
The day our love blooms.
la... la... la...
虹がキレイだよ。
The rainbow is beautiful.
いや、お前の方が...。
No, you are more beautiful...
テレはじめるきみに
To you who begins to shine,
ありがとう。ありがとう。
Thank you. Thank you.
i just realised my new blog has no song bg whatsoever. im probably going to add this song as my new background music. its soothing and i really like it, even if its not my precious ohno singing. if it were i'd be melting by now. x)
right now im in the office helping my dad type japanese. japanese has really become my outlet now... more and more so.
昨日は、 私 と ふうゆえ でんわ お はなします。 ちょっと だけ、 でも ね。。 しあわせ ですよ。 二時半、 三時？ わすれた。。 ぜんぶ も いま 大丈夫 から。。 私 の ゆめ、 私 の 未来、 大丈夫 から。。 何時も 何時も 全部 も しらない。。 ちょっと むずかしい ね。。 でも さ。。 いま は。。。 してる よ。 たいせつな ひと、 ごめなさい。 ぜんぶ も あなた の ため に。
ありがとう、 みんな。 ありがとう、あなた。 いま 私 わすれない、 けど つよくなる。 あなた のために だから。いのち わ 生きてる。 まって いた、 私たち の 日。。 ともだち も いい。。 絶対 に。。 はなせない。
ok i got to go back to work~ hehehee. ^^ PHYPHY REMEMBER STUDY FOR UR TEST!
[[OMG I FORGOT TOMORROW I HAVE MY BASIC THEORY TEST AND I SO HAVE NOT STUDIED!!! DIEEEE!!!!!]]
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