there are two paths in front of you. the first is a lit path, but at the end you see a future you dont want. the second is a dark path, you cant see anything ahead of you. you dont know if its scarier, or not.

which path would you choose to take? most people would advice you to take the lit path, because you know whats in store: at least you know its safe. would you? or would you risk it on a second path, not knowing what career lies ahead of you, or whether they'll be an end at all?

or will you jsut choose to stand at the fork of that road, until one day a decision will be made for you?

in life we're always given decisions like these. neither seem to be the right answer, yet you still have to pick one. for me, i dont know if ive chosen, or whether im still staying on the forked path, where it seems safest.

maybe one day i will decide.

im back again.

for once i find myself at a loss. words can no longer describe what im feeling. i guess one thing that hit me in my comment box was the word "hide". i wouldnt say that im hiding, but the fear is adequately accepting that as an answer.

ive come to question myself about a lot of things. what with being 21, i guess its time to think about life as a whole. and after thinking through it all, ive come to the conclusion that i dont think this year is going to be any better than anything. age, is just a number after all.

ive heard about friends who think they won't make it past june, ive known of people who, knowing they may not survive past a certain period of time that seems to be drawing so much closer every day, and yet they smile and laugh like nothing can burst their bubble.

and yet on the other hand, here i am. not sure what to do, not sure what's ahead. not even sure if i can accept my future when it comes along. there's a lot in my future that's pretty uncertain. and there are parts of it, that if it comes true, are unacceptable.

strange, i can seem to solve or guess problems amongst my friends. i just cant solve my own.

well. its been a long time since i wrote something here. its been a long time since i felt the desire to write anything, or talk about anything. rest assured i'm okay. still alive, all body parts intact.

a lot has happened this past month. ups, and downs. ive missed out on a lot of things i deeply regret, but its too late now. i guess you can say ive been MIAing from almost everything. almost no one has seen me in the past month. ive stopped reading blogs, stopped blogging in general. dont ask me why, i dont know.

since the last post, i havent actually read the comments on my own blog. i havent read any blogs so i dont know whats going on with everyone, but i hope everyone's okay.

a lot has happened, ranging from me losing my handphone, to applying for uni, finding a job, quarrelling with the folks. time seems to have gone by and im staying still. to be honest i dont know if i want to move along with time.

i cant say i miss seeing you girls, because ive always been the one MIAing. ive always been the one skipping out on outings and skipping out on almost everything. i hope everyone's going on fine.

i guess my main reason for posting this is just to assure you guys im okay.