thank you to all who consoled me. especially アロイ -kun and hiryuu-kun. i figured out what's wrong. thank you fufu-chan too, for tarot-ing for me. its quite accurate if its what i think it is...

last night i was thinking to myself of a number i couldn't place.

today i decided, just now, to message that unknown number, and see if i got a reply. and i did.

guess who it was?

desmond. no not the one i recently met from Citibank. the desmond from year 1, currently in NP. yes, my ex boyfriend desmond. =X i dont know why, but suddenly recalling his number reminded me how much i couldn't forget him at one point, and now i cant wait to forget.

went out with fufu-chan today to get my printed works.. said it would rain and it did. said it wont rain at my house, and it didn't. i no longer care for coincidences... as fufu said... something about loneliness, about cynism and something else. made me realise for this case at least, it makes sense.

tomorrow internship begins. i really cant wait.

p.s. ありがとう　ね、　アロイ　くん。　でんわ　を　話して。。　ほんと　に　ありがとう。

im not worried about it anymore. in fact, i'll take the opportunity to do what i intended to do. the fact that im right makes me slightly more confident in moving my plans forward.

p.s.s. for some reason andrew found my friendster. yes, JCC president andrew. no idea how, dont wanna know. he looks skinnier in photogrpahs than in real life xD hahahahaa. no offence.