drive a stake through my heart and let me die

oh goodyness. stage of coincidence. i was just starting to think abt what would happen if i saw my ex... =X and when i got on to the mrt i was talking to my friend about him. she asked me hw he looks like, and i told her to look in front of her. =X the more i started looking at him the more i noticed him. how in the world did he look so much like my ex? now im starting to wonder whether it really was him, or just my mind playing tricks on me. i dont know.. but either way its a good thing. in this case it means ive done every possible thing that could make me think of him, and yet im still perfectly fine. so i guess this proves that im already over it, huh?

i dont know... i just feel that its too much of a coincidence. my mind feels like its playing games with me. but the way he looked at me so often, i began to feel that he recognised me from somewhere. could he really be my ex? if so... how did i not recognise him? and did he hear what i was saying? hm... either way it doesnt matter anymore. ex are meant to be ex. ive gotten over it. finally this proves it. YAY XIUZHI I DIDNT TAKE A YEAR LIKE YOU PREDICTED.

well... whether it really was him or not no longer bothers me... its just a big test to me. and im perfectly fine, (adding a little goosebumps here and there). i feel normal, i guess. =X heart's pounding, but it feels good. feels like adrenaline, not pain. =) ive gotten over it at last...

thank you for being by my side to support me, my friends. its due to you that ive gotten over it so quickly. =)

as for the incident today, im not exactly sure whats going to happen from here, but i dont think we're going to end our friendship just because of this incident. sure, its gonna take some time, but i believe we can get over it. i mean... there are still things lacking that we need to know... but all in all i feel as though ive already forgiven her. even though her posse and our grp has been treating each other like ghosts... i guess its a good thing. =) perfect thing, in fact. i feel like myself again.

well... today has been a roller coaster day of events.. and im glad i was strong enough psychologically to take it. thanks guys for being there for me. you're my pillar of strength.

let me die alone, where no one can see. where no one can understand the reason behind my suicide: My happiness.

Takahashi Hinoki

school day

hai... finally i'll be going back to school. havent figured out whether its a good thing or a bad thing. i mean... its nice that i dont have to stay home for one more week, but waking up at 6 is still a killer to my system. =X also, just like the rest of us, i dont want to go back because there are definitely people that i dont want to see this time round. =X its just an instinct to avoid conflicts in my case... but if they cant be avoided, the least i can do is treat them with caution and careful consideration.

i mean... i dont know what's going on in school and i dont know whether or not the first day will be good, or whether it will totally suck as a whole, but at least i'll see phy and the gang... that in itself is already a reward. =) i dont even know why im up so early today...its not even 6 yet. but since im up, i decided its better not to go back to bed. =P

well.. off to school now!

a new beginning is what makes everything worthwhile: the ability to start afresh and pretend nothing has ever happened.

Takahashi Hinoki

hooked on shopping

a few days ago, me and my mom went shopping. i bought 2 pair of pants (green and pink for some reason). i also bought headphones. but when i reached home i realised my mp3 player died.. =( so its abit of a useless headphone now. and i would really buy a new mp3 player, but im saving money for a video camera... even though im not sure what brand i want. so far ive gotten 2 pieces of advice.

Eugene say either sony or canon...

Kaifon says the more expensive version... but not sony... he say sony too expensive...

hai... i have too many things to save for. apparently we're going taiwan at the end of the year... which gives me more things to save for. =( i so dont have the money.

the next few weeks are going to be seriously packed for me. on wednesday i either haf to go to the art house or go to the chiba briefing... next wednesday i most likely have the same thing with the miyazaki and hokkaido briefing. i still need to book venues... sze yuan help me!!!

well... i also need to go and find out about the mile programme... still pondering on whether to host the mile and chiba together. then there's the miyazaki/kumamoto students coming over. its not much of an issue, but i have a strong temptation of hosting them, even if just for one day. hai... exchange club sure is busy..

as for school work, since its the holidays, im not sure how busy i will be from now... i still considering about the forum thing.. havent told them that im not interested in it... grace and mrs lim sure ask me for reason de.

so this is my to-do list...

1. find out which camera i should buy (diff between tape and dvd recording)
2. see if mrs lim has the bigger version of sajafa and singapore poly logo...
3. measure the banner size for the trip
4. book venues for both camps as well as the briefings
5. ask janice whether she want to work in SAA on the 5th...
6. call miyazaki and hokkaido people once venue is confirmed
7. find out about mile and chiba
8. decide whether or not to host them together for camp
9. make final "what to learn during camp" data
10. find out when is the MILE programme audition

gah my wednesdays are really packed.. but its better than a really empty life. =P ahh well i prefer it this way. hehe. cant wait for the camp. i haf to go down to details later... =X but that one wait until proposal is submitted. =)

as for going back to school... im kinda excited about it.. even though im not sure whats gona happen in class. but its an interesting twist than staying at home all day though. =) hehe.

an interesting life always beats an unknown one... im glad my life turned out this way. even with all the weird twists and turns, its going to be alright in the end.

Takahashi Hinoki

old parliment house visit

A few days ago, xiuzhi janice phyllis and me went to old parliment house, to visit the artS house. we initially planned on going for the tour... but...

we got desperately lost... walking through "jungles"... (taking photos)

looking for signs (and taking more photos...)


Finally we found the place... and we went inside... There wasn't much to see inside...

After that, the four of us went to Suntec (via walking), and was nearly caught in the rain. Fortunately, we took the underpass, and didnt get soaked. After finally reaching suntec, we went to an underwear shop... phyllis bought underwear while xiuzhi and janice starting using their talents and helped phyllis find more within the pile of underwear that came up to our shoulders (i mean this quite literally).

then... finally... we went to eat lunch at... NYDC (aka... nice young dumb cow)

i ate this... they called it the three amigos... hm... interesting name. anyway xiuzhi kept stealing my cheese, and janice ate all the parts that i didnt like xD
phyllis ate this.. don't remember what it was called... but it was a sandwich kinda thing. and knowing phyllis.. she left the sides of the bread untouched... no more ingredients she says... xD

xiuzhi ate this... erm. its actually meatball spagetti... i tried it. not bad. but the serving was kinda huge... xD

eh... after much consideration, janice decided to eat this... probably because she didn't get to eat her potato salad thingy... and i have yet to pay her back.

Then the four of us happily went to the arcade, where phyllis and I decided to try out our musical abilities. We exercised with DDR, then waved around like idiots with Para Para, before I killed her in the drums game. hehehehe. meanwhile, xiuzhi was watching us, and janice went to play drums while waiting for michelle.

then phyllis decided to sit on this... we helped her shop for shoes, but she didnt find any of her liking. then janice and i bought japanese sweets, which got stuck in my teeth. After Michelle arrived, we decided to watch... the number 1 show in america, above the da vinci code... xiuzhi, phyllis and i watched CARS. it was funny though. =P

yeah.. finally the four of us manage to hang out during the holidays... so long... but HEY it was a fun day... filled with odd photos. phyllis if u read this pls upload the funny photos like u and me jumping, xiuzhi and me next to the weird statue, and janice next to the *#@ sign. hehehe.

well... after designing from scratch this blog, im kinda tired... =P

Takahashi Hinoki